Taking a Gander at the Marriage Vow
Yesterday, as I pulled into McDonalds for lunch the forecast was for cooler weather. I could have guessed it from what I saw in front of me as I guided my Honda into my favorite parking spot. As I downed my fish sandwich I saw them. Geese! Yes, the familiar little flock (gaggle, it’s called) had arrived from the north on its annual stopover at the vacant lot next to McDonalds. Only the vacant lot was no longer vacant.
And therein Lay the Problem
These huge birds were lost. They thought they were in the right place, but it turned out to be the wrong place — or was it? They were waddling — dazed — across the huge black-top parking area that belongs to a large strip mall. The geese weren’t honking, but many car horns were while the flock with folded wings dodged dangerously among the cars, including a goose who had an awful limp. Suddenly and to the chagrin of the confused drivers the geese split — still walking (or running) but all going in different directions vainly looking for familiar land while totally oblivious of the cars. I was relieved when — after a long time — the geese emerged together, all accounted for, and all making concession for their lame friend.
Goose-bumps
That’s when I almost left my car to address them like a homeroom teacher on the first day of school: “Hey, you ganders (and girls, too) you’re in the right place but since your last trip Wendy’s has cleared the trees, made a parking lot, planted grass, and built a store to rival McDonalds.” I felt for those birds yet something about that flock standing there together looking at me sent a warm quiver though my soul. Invisible Goose bumps maybe? It hit me that those bewildered birds were confident of one sure thing. They had each other.
And herein Lies also the Nut Kernel Truth of the Marriage Vow
Some weddings are huge, some very small, and some are indescribably creative in location and as well as staging. But no matter how simple, beautiful, exotic, or passionate the wedding ceremony is there is only one little part that’s absolutely necessary without which a marriage has not taken place and with it nothing else needs to take place. It’s that simple vow that takes about 30 seconds for both to repeat and confirm.
I promise before God and these witnesses
to be your faithful husband/wife;
in plenty and in want;
in sickness and in health;
as long as we both shall live.
The Goose Version of that Vow puts Bride, Groom, and Goose on the same Level
A goose is faithful and loyal to its companion till death;
no matter the terrain, the weather,
the circumstances, the season;
in plenty and in want;
in sickness and in health.
Symbolism and Instinct
Bird enthusiasts and ornithologists tell us that different species symbolize different attributes. The goose symbolizes loyalty, faithfulness, and comradeship. This is fact. We’re even told that a goose will insure with its life the safety of a companion goose. Why? Instinct! Geese don’t take vows. Loyalty and faithfulness is inborn. The goose can do no other. And that’s true in humans if speaking of a mother and her newborn. But instinct is not in play when bride and groom stand next to each other at the marriage altar. What is in play is a promise — a witnessed promise. The result is the same as the goose instinct — loyalty, faithfulness, and companionship. However, the vow is more beautiful than instinct because the vow emanates from love.
When change Happens
Mimi’s favorite saying is “Nothing stays the same.” My goose story is all about that universal fact we use one little word to describe — change. Though huge change had taken place the geese stayed true to their instinct. So in marriage, each partner stays true to the vow made no matter what changes. And that’s the way God loves us — not by instinct but by choice. Nothing is more beautiful than that kind of love. Speaking of beauty, few things are more beautiful than geese in flight. But also, we’re told, there are no birds as messy as a gaggle of geese on the ground. This too sounds a lot like marriage, but that’s another blog.